On Bachelor Parties

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One of Naveed’s good guy friends was the first out of their group to get engaged. Naturally, the rest of the guys in their friend group have been waiting over a year to throw him an elaborate bachelor party. 

Now me being naiive, I figure they’ll hit Atlantic City or maybe even Vegas. I know they like to “do it big.Boy, was I wrong. 

Because right now, my main squeeze is sippin’ a pina coloada (or something more manly, but I wouldn’t put it past him to have some blended girly drink), on the sandy white beaches of MEXICO.

Don’t you hate him just a little? 

Bachelor parties are a funny thing, aren’t they. You can either be the cool girlfriend who is like “sure, have fun!” or you’re a controlling psycho who is like “absolutely not.” Trying to fall somewhere in between is a delicate balance.

Naveed solved this whole problem perfectly. You see, with them going to Mexico, I’m a lot more worried about them getting too drunk and being captured and decapitated by drug lords. 
Or winding up in Mexican jail and having to bribe the police. 
Or even just drinking the water. 
(Bottled beverages only Nav!)

Naturally, those other bachelor party activities have been the last thing on my mind. I know they’ll have a great time. And I also know that Naveed has too much respect (and love, ya know, cause that’s important too) for me to do anything I wouldn’t approve of. 

So at this point, my sense of unease just stems from the fact that I want him to come back with his head attached. Is that too much to ask? 

What are your feelings about bachelor parties? Did you opt for the “cool girlfriend/fiance” route? Did your man have one?

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  • My husband went to Vegas for his bachelor party and I stayed in the city I lived in for mine (lame). I was freaking out the whole weekend that something bad would happen, but the worst thing that happened is that he drank too much the last night he was there and got sick on the plane ride home. I think there is too much hype behind bachelor/bachelorette parties because of the movies – there really isn’t anything to be afraid of as long as your man’s friends aren’t crazy!!

    • I’d love to go to vegas for mine, simply because I haven’t been to vegas since I turned 21! My guys friends aren’t super crazy. The single ones are more rowdy but the ones in relationships keep them all in check lol.

  • AA

    What! We need better friends! My bachelorette party was basically bar hopping around a city my friend lived in (oh, 30some miles from where I lived) and my husband’s bachelor party was a day-long golf outing. No one wanted to commit to anything more than a day (including me, actually). I think they’re generally a lot less wild than in the movies though. Mostly just a bunch of drunk dudes embarrassing themselves. The worst thing I ever heard of happening at one was that the drunk groom fell down a flight of stairs and had a black eye and a bunch of bloody scrapes just in time for his wedding day.

    • Oh my gosh! How bad would it be if your guy had a black eye in all the pictures? I wouldn’t be too worried about Nav but I could see the too drunk thing happening to most guys.

    • AA

      That couple definitely regrets the choice to do the bachelor party the night before the wedding. He was all brusied up for their photos!

  • It all depends on the couple. I know of some couples who have done joint parties. Where they split up for the bachelor/bachelorette parties and then at the end of the night everyone joined back up together. That’s usually because we’re all friends with each other and wouldn’t enjoy celebrating separately. Others have been separate, but always pretty tame. Like the guys going to a baseball game together and having some drinks after or something. I say that if you do bachelor/bachelorette parties talk to each other honestly and set boundaries. If there are certain things that would happen at a party which would make you really upset, tell him, and vise versa. My favorite bachelorette party was us girls going to a White Sox game (we got to see some hunky sailors and we got on the big screen with the bride!) then we went back to her place for drinks and a “personal shower.” It was so fun!

    • I love the idea of everyone meeting up at the middle of the night! I’ve never heard of that but it sounds perfect! I completely trust Naveed so I wouldn’t be too worried but I think we’d have to get engaged first lol. I love talking about weddings and all the fun stuff even if we aren’t (yet).

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  • Wow…MEXICO? I want to do that! I am now starting to navigate the bachelor/bachelorette waters since I’m planning my own wedding. Luckily my fiance only wants to go back to visit our old town in Utah…I am the one who wants the wild trip! 🙂

    • Now that he is in Mexico I just want to go on a trip anywhere! I bet we’ll all go to vegas for our respective parties.

  • My hubs had an ELABORATE bachelor party at a 5 Star Resort because his best friend works there. They rented two “cabins” (more like like luxury homes) and had an amazing time. I don’t know most of the details, and honestly I don’t want to, but it was a party he’ll never forget. I am “the cool wife” and didn’t make a stink… like you said, if I didn’t trust him there’d be a bigger problem.

    • Agreed. Trust is the most important thing. That bachelor party sounds like a ton of fun!

  • My husband had a picnic in the park with all his best guy friends and I didnt have a bachelorette party. We’re lame right? Haha! We are both so laid back and not huge party people. We were perfectly fine with how things went.

    storiesofkel.blogspot.com

    • Aw that’s really sweet. I like that. I think my guy and I will want to get a little more rowdy 😉

  • Mexico? MEXICO?! what the what? sounds awesome. it pains me to say, but to be honest a party in vegas or something would make me feel uncomfortable. I have a feeling that my man is going to plan some sort of scotch and cigar night

    • This question applies to you! Congratulations on your engagement! I’m just discussing the theoretical. I bet Nav and I will both do something fun that will involved lots of beverages and a night out.

  • My husband went to Atlantic City (we were living in NYC) and actually wanted my dad and brother to go with him and his friends! So my dad, my brother, my uncle, and a few of my dad’s friends met up with my hubby and his friends and they had such a great weekend, they still talk about it all the time. As for me, since all my girlfriends were on the west coast, we all met in Vegas and had a great weekend. But we didn’t do any of that Thunder from Down Under/Chippendales stuff (not my thing). We just went to the pool parties and a few clubs. It was a great weekend!

    • Your bachelorette party sounds like exactly what I’d like to do. A few drinks, a few clubs, the pool. Sounds amazing!

  • I’m with you- a little worried (because it’s easy to be worried about the one you love when they’re away, regardless of what they’re doing) but I still tried to play it cool. 🙂 Love reading your blog and little Archie- your pics of him are my source when trying to convince my man that we need a dog! 😉

    • Lizzie, this comment made my day. I show an inappropriate amount of pictures of Archie. If you want to see more, you can always “like” my facebook page here: http://www.facebook.com/backeastblonde I’ve got an Archie album!

  • My rule with Ben is that I don’t care about him going to strip clubs or gambling or whatever, but as a woman I don’t need to know the details. I know he loves and respects me, so if he wants to go out for one night to celebrate a marriage of him or a buddy, then go have fun, come back and let’s resume daily life. I don’t love it, but I’m not going to tell him he can’t go. He is 29 years old for God’s sakes! Mexico sounds fun! I’m sure he will return in one piece. 😉

    • I think that’s a good strategy. See, you’re the cool girlfriend (almost fiance!). I try to be and I trust Nav completely. I just hate that he is flying (cause I hate flying) and that he is in Mexico.

  • We are both having our parties in Vegas, just on separate weekends. I trust my fiance with everything so I know he is just going there to have fun. Not to hook up “one last time”. Plus he is going with all his married friends! He also has nothing to worry about with me:)

  • For me it all depends on the group he’s going with… The first bachelor party he wanted to go to was in Vegas, and it was for a friend I COULD NOT STAND. This guy was slimy and so were most of the other people going, and I did not trust my hubby being out of town with him. They were his work friends. I went the crazybishh route and said HELL NO. We didn’t really have the money at the time anyways so he didn’t really put up a fight. All bachelor invites since then I have been fine with 🙂 He went to Tahoe and had a crazy good time for his bachelor party and I was fine with that too 🙂

  • I don’t have a problem with them. And honestly, I do not have a problem with my hubs going to a strip club if that is where the bach party were to go. I know he would never do anything to betray my respect or trust. Besides, he doesn’t believe in spending his money for a lap dance anyway. He’s too frugal!

  • I wish my friends and I could have afforded to go somewhere, but the majority of us was in graduate school. I don’t have a problem with bachelor parties. I think trust plays a big part. I don’t think I would have cared if my hubby took a trip for his bachelor party, except be really jealous (especially if I wasn’t going anywhere). My hubby and I both had one if you could call it that. He went out with friends and drank at the bars and stuff. Nothing major. My friend had me a Pure Romance (which I know own my business in that), and after that, we went out to the bars and drank. No strip clubs were involved, because we both think that it rather gross. However, guys were hitting on me and wanting to dance… I was like ummm no. I didn’t care it was my “last night” out. I mean, I am not single. I just don’t dance haha

  • That is awesome for him! I bet he is having a blast.. I definitely know where you are coming from. I worry just when Shane goes out to bars(this is a once a year thing). I know he can handle himself sober but I don’t trust him drunk and his friends all drunk together.. never seems to go well! We are in the process of planning bachelorette/bachelor parties for me and my fiance at the moment. I live in Louisiana and the go to place down here is Bourbon Street, which honestly is probably where we will wind up. However, Shane has never been a partier and his idea of a bachelor party is a weekend at the camp hunting and drinkin’ some brewskies (ha!). I am okay with this :).

  • Cool fiancé! I know their plans for the evening (involving his ex who is now a stripper…. yeah) and I’m totally fine with it. I actually wish I could go because it would be so fun, haha. I hope he has as much of a great time as I did, because my night was amazing – and completely respectful! I had a great time with my girls, so I hope he does the same 🙂

  • I’m usually somewhere between the “Go and have so much fun!” and the “No, stay home with me!” I think it depends on where they are going/who they are going with ya know? I feel alot better about it if I know the other guys that are going just because I know what to expect. I can’t believe he went to Mexico! Lucky! I’ve never known anyone that had that big of a bachelor/bachelorette party!

  • Eeek you’re right this is such a delicate balance! I would never worry about my guy doing anything terrible but his friends/super rowdy brothers would be a little bit of a concern for me. Especially because I’ve seen how he has trouble not succumbing to their peer pressure!

  • This is definitely a tough one…I’m never quite sure how to handle it. I think I’m an incredibly cool wife of course, and typically I just say please be careful and whatever you do call me before you go to bed so I know you survived. BUT on the inside a piece of me wants to freak out and be like NOOOO! You can’t go! Luckily, I trust Arsen to never do anything wild or crazy (within reason), but still….it’s not easy to sit at home knowing he and all his insane guy friends are out on the town living it up.

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  • Brandon Howard

    Interesting! I have a friend getting married this fall and I am trying to throw him a bachelor party in Vegas. I need suggestions.

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