What We Fight About

Sometimes N and I fight. I know, shocking. But the best fights are the ones that are really just extended, intense conversations about our strong feelings about super specific subjects. We have these on road trips a lot.

I’ll give you an example of something we fight about: N and I have an ongoing, hilarious but serious argument about whether or not video games are good for children and whether or not our children will be allowed to play video games. You know, we fight over details about the kids we are years away from having. Makes sense.

video games

N played video games his entire childhood. Lots of them. His immigrant parents did not really understand the rating system of video games and movies and therefore both N and his brother watched lots of things I was definitely not allowed to watch (like 80’s Jean Claude Van Dam movies). His argument is that video games helped him develop critical thinking skills and that many video games are like puzzles, which are good for kids.

I on the other hand, watched very little TV and played video games only minimally (think Super Mario Brothers on occasion). You can read more about my childhood deprived of TMNT, power rangers, and army men here.  I feel strongly that this was a good thing and that it contributed to me being the voracious reader that I am today. I also think that if you want a kid to do a puzzle, you give them a freaking puzzle. The cardboard kind. And I’m adamantly against kids playing 1st person shooter games, no matter what research says.

This entire explanation is irrelevant because honestly, we’ll meet somewhere in the middle about this. We’ll carefully monitor every video game they play and with a Dad who understands gaming as much as N does, I’m sure it will all be appropriate. But again, we are years away from making these decisions. We aren’t parents yet. If I know one thing about parenting it’s that you don’t know anything about parenting until you are a parent.

I just always wonder about what other couples disagree about and I thought I’d share. Sometimes we have intense conversations about subjects that are completely irrelevant to our lives now. I think it’s a good thing and whether we agree or not, I kind of love these talks.

What do you and your partner fight about? Do you have theoretical conversations like these?

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